Most of us have heard that to be creative we must be in touch with our inner child, and that our inner child is the creative aspect of ourselves. This is true. But sometimes a big block to being creative is failing to grow up. When clients come to me blocked in their creativity we look at how their beliefs and behavior have formed predictable outcomes. More often than not, my client has the belief system of a child; he hasn’t yet fully grown up. While he may be in his 40’s, parents to young children, or even a grandparent, these life events do not guarantee that he is a grown-up.
How does not growing up block our creativity? To successfully create, we must be partnered with Spirit. We are fully equal partners, not Spirit as above us in hierarchy and we below. So many of us come to the conscious spiritual path with our parental issues still unhealed. We look to Spirit to take care of us, to guarantee us a life of grace and flow. In fact, what can happen is that Spirit pushes us into growing up, and this process can be very uncomfortable.
If we have a Heart’s Desire directed from our Soul, such as to make a big splash in the world by being a leader, or to write a best selling novel, or to sell a beloved screenplay, but we haven’t yet grown up, Life is going to put in our way opportunity after opportunity to become responsible for ourselves. Many clients have told me this is too scary. And yes, it is frightening. Yes, it does require courage, yes, that means facing down fear, and yes that means we might fail. Many clients have told me that this is not fair—this isn’t what the conscious Spiritual path promised. These clients want the childish wish of success with no risk. Of course it is much much easier to not grow up! For a fully empowered creative life, growing up is required.
One of the pitfalls of working as a psychic and shaman is being put in the position of Rescuer and Good Mother. Many a client who has not grown up wants me to be responsible for decisions, and they expect favorable outcomes. Of course, the purpose of my life and practice is to be of service to others in empowering themselves, the complete reverse of unspoken expectations from clients unwilling to grow up. When I point out to these clients that they need to start making decisions for themselves, they are usually shocked and resentful. Most of these clients want me to tell them exactly what to do. They want the guarantee of the successful life without feeling the burden of doing their own work.
We are all creative beings. We all have a creative inner child. That inner child needs proper guidance and parenting. So many of us did not get that kind of support from our own parents, or we received good parenting for the survival or practical side of life, but creativity was labeled impractical or squashed. We may have hurt and shaken inner children to guide. We may have a fantastical, whimsical but totally flighty inner child. It is up to us to guide our precious inner selves into manifesting what we love on the physical plane. That requires a good parent; that requires us to be Grown Ups.
Growing up means that we make a decision and we accept the consequences. Growing up means that we stop straddling fences and commit to our Hearts or that we accept that we aren’t willing to do so. Growing up means that we look at our needs and the needs of others around us and take the whole picture into consideration instead of satisfying our own needs selfishly and justifying it as self-care or satisfying everyone else’s needs before our own and justifying that as being caring and reliable. Growing up literally means being willing to make hard decisions even though they may be completely wrong and may lead to failure, disaster, and even death. (Empaths love to block themselves with a little Drama!)
Growing up means becoming more Conscious. Anyone who has done the work of staying Conscious will tell you that it is no fun, but it is totally worth it. Creativity requires being in the moment, and requires being Conscious. Creativity can be uncomfortable because as we create we come across all sorts of feelings, thought-forms, and bodily sensations that simply do not feel pleasant. Not to mention the grip of being consumed by a creative project. It is no wonder that so many creative people resist creating even though we love it and are driven to do it! But, if we are Grown Ups, we show up and do the work to manifest our Dream and Vision despite the unhappy feelings, despite the negative thoughts, despite the physical discomfort, despite unsupportive friends, family, etc. (Some of you may ask, does creating always feel this horrible? Not always, but creativity requires going into the void, and human beings don’t like that because it is unknown and uncertain, which means scary and risky.)
Grown ups transcend the natural difficulties in a situation—as my husband likes to say, Grown ups Suck It Up and Deal! When we come to accept that creativity can be difficult emotionally, challenging mentally, and full of risks, these obstacles cease to be so daunting. We just get on with it instead. We move forward a little bit, a little at a time. Sometimes we will be inspired, sometimes we won’t be. But the Grown Up gets out there consistently. We are here to be creative. That means that there must be some daily doing, which means that there must be some daily discipline, which means there must be some daily self-coaching.
Just like we send our kids to school every morning unless they are sick or feeling unsafe, we set our inner child to work on our creativity, with us as the Grown Up in charge. This may seem harsh, unjust, and unfair. This may not seem like bliss, ease, grace, and flow. This may seem contrary to what the conscious spiritual path promised. If you think so, let your inner child throw a tantrum, and then make the decision to Suck It Up and Get On With It!